I am in the "I'll change soon mode", except that I am not changing. Weight is still going up. Now I have the false security of New Year's to buoy my spirits. I realize that there is nothing trully magical about that day, but I am still counting on it as a switch to enlightenment and success.
I am not eating at home; I am not planning or preparing food; I am not working out; I am not attending church. I am basically not trying. I guess the good thing is that I am not disappointed per se, but I should be. How can I be disappointed if I am not trying? (anyone else use this ploy in life?) But if nothing else, my temporary setback equates to a longer road to success and that does matter.
Will today be different? Probably not, I am not mentality prepared yet. Why? I am not sure. The dangerous thing is that I know that I will get there. It is dangerous because I know I will get there so why not procrastinate longer? Ugh!
Lesson to be learned? Consider that an unbalanced life stresses what is a challenge and leads to what is comfortable. Giving up new habits is quickly and strongly related to stressful periods of life. Stress will continue to come to me, but I can work on stress management, decreasing the risk of triggers and improve my coping skills.
Am I resolved? Not yet.
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